365.

367 days ago…

I was post school but pre HSC.

I was probably going to marry a guitar playing, hair swishing, pastors kid.

I was probably very proud.

I was very single.

When Josh started asking me out I said no, 3 times. The first 2, rightfully so. His hair didn’t flick and he didn’t play the guitar. He was a hard working tradesman who liked dirt bikes and hated churchy events. None of these reasons were valid, but he was also not a Christian, so I said no. Further down the track this last reason changed. But I was I was still caught up on my plans for my future husband, ignoring all that God had put in front of me.

He hadn’t learnt to play guitar and his dad hadn’t suddenly become a pastor but the Holy Spirit was transforming his heart to be like Jesus. He had a longing to lead well and to provide for me. He understood that he was sinful and that nothing he could do was good enough to reconcile himself to God. He understood that he must do things the way God had designed for them to be done, in obedience to King Jesus. So

365 days ago…

I said yes.

I thought I had made a big mistake.

I was very wrong.

A year later I find myself engaged to a mature man of God – who thrives off looking after kids and helping people out without any expectation of thanks or reward. Who is kind to me and others and tries to look for Gods glory rather then his own. Who’s parents love us both, lead by example and teach us regularly how to be godly. Who leads well, works hard and is of course unbelievably handsome.

Looking back on the last 12 months I can see my pride. How wrong I was to think that my plans and expectations for my life were any better than Gods! How wrong I was to think that a mans godliness could be measured by how musical, emotional and easy going he appeared rather than how hard working, committed to provision and keen to lead he was. How wrong I was to think that marriage was for my enjoyment or comfort rather than Gods service.

How thankful I am that God is bigger than my foolishness and kinder than I was, in giving me a man who longs to love me as Christ loved the church.

I love you JPM, happy anniversary.